HELLO LIFE!

For more than a decade, I had this fear that I was definitely going to die young and in the same manner like someone I knew who was very close to me. I was scared to die young and leave behind everyone I love. I tortured myself with this fear and it dictated how I lived my life until another loss thought me to overcome this fear.

Sometimes we lose people in terrible ways but it does not mean we will also die in the same manner. Some people die violently while others die peacefully.

Death is devastating. It changes your life in so many ways. The hardest part is pretending to be strong when you are not. There are some loss you can never get over. Nothing can ever make you feel better. Sometimes you wish you died too so you will not have to live without these people.

After several years of living without these people, I have come to accept that death is inevitable and life eventually comes to an end. Most often we do not know when we will die. Some people will die young and others will die old. It does not matter how long live but how well you live. There are some people who lived till their old age and yet their lives were unfulfilled and there are those who lived short lives and yet their lives were fulfilled.

I am not scared of dying young or even dying anymore. It does not matter how long I live. I want to have a fulfilled life. I want to experience my last moment on earth with a smile and laughter because my years on earth were worth it. I want to spend the rest of my life with my loved ones who are still alive and create many pleasant memories as possible.

My pain will never go away but I can manage it. My life will never be the same without them but I will move on.

I will not let death become a barrier that stops me from living.

Bisous!